Aha! He had a double ear infection!!! Not that I'm happy about it, but just...you know...I wasn't crazy. Anyway, this is how things unfolded:
He took a three hour nap but woke up once in a while whimpering and trying to get comfortable. By the third hour I decided that a temp check was in order, so I waited for the next wake-up and got out the thermometer. He'd hit 102.2 and had turned into a little glassy-eyed dishrag. I conferred with T.G. and we called the doctor. They had me come right in with him and within minutes we had a diagnosis and a prescription for antibiotics. T.G. watched Little Guy while I zipped over to the CVS and got infant fever reducer and antibiotic pink syrup. When I got home Little Guy was flopped against T.G., eating Indian food and acting like a wet noodle. Typical Little Guy, he won't even let an ear infection come between him and a plate of palak paneer. I gave him the medicine and, after a little yogurt, he was tucked into bed. He's sleeping now and I'm watching him on the monitor. Poor little buddy. I hate when he's sick. The antibiotic they gave me is a pretty powerful one, so I'm hoping he will be feeling better by morning. Neurotic Mommy over and out.
Monday, June 14, 2010
Neurotic Mommy Syndrome
This morning I noticed that Little Guy just wasn't himself. He didn't have his normal hoover-like appetite and he was acting really clingy. One trip to the thermometer confirmed my fears, he had a fever. 101.1, nothing too scary, but me being me...well...I switched straight into mild freak out mode. See he's only been sick once before, aside from the debacle when he was born of course. I called my mom, I texted Nickel because she has three kids, I told T.G. about my concerns. T.G. said it sounded like he had a little bug, and to watch him. Nickel said it sounded like a little bug, and to watch him. My mom said it sounded like a little bug, and to watch him.
So I watched him.
One hour later he was turning into a noodle-baby and his temperature had gone up to 101.5. I called Nickel, because she is the Queen of All Things Feverish in Children. Her son has something called Periodic Fever Syndrome and what she doesn't know about fevers would fit on a tic tac with room for cliff notes. She said it was still nothing to worry about, but to keep and eye on him and to push fluids. After I hung up with her I called my mom to give her a progress report and she said the same thing. Little Guy is currently sleeping, and I'm watching him on the monitor screen to make sure there are no seizures or anything. Nickel said seizures would be a symptom she considers capital B bad, not that I wouldn't have realized they were bad, but I hadn't thought of them before she said that. So now I'm watching for them. Yeah, I'm totally neurotic. I admit it. I've come to terms with my worry-wart self. This whole mommy business still has daily surprises for me since I've only got Little Guy and literally no previous experience with children under two. Truthfully, I've gotten much better. I let him play in the yard and pick up grass and dirt. I let him eat goldfish and cheerios without helicoptering about him waiting for the choking to ensue. If his nuk falls on the floor, I don't frantically sterilize it anymore. He gets smooched by the dogs without me feeling the need to wash their kisses off. Two weeks ago he stayed in the church nursery without me. I'm learning and growing and chilling out.
But...
I'm still nervous about him being sick. So my little noodle-baby is sleeping right now, and I'm watching him like a hawk and helicopter rolled up into one. I bet Nickel can hear my propeller across the West End.
So I watched him.
One hour later he was turning into a noodle-baby and his temperature had gone up to 101.5. I called Nickel, because she is the Queen of All Things Feverish in Children. Her son has something called Periodic Fever Syndrome and what she doesn't know about fevers would fit on a tic tac with room for cliff notes. She said it was still nothing to worry about, but to keep and eye on him and to push fluids. After I hung up with her I called my mom to give her a progress report and she said the same thing. Little Guy is currently sleeping, and I'm watching him on the monitor screen to make sure there are no seizures or anything. Nickel said seizures would be a symptom she considers capital B bad, not that I wouldn't have realized they were bad, but I hadn't thought of them before she said that. So now I'm watching for them. Yeah, I'm totally neurotic. I admit it. I've come to terms with my worry-wart self. This whole mommy business still has daily surprises for me since I've only got Little Guy and literally no previous experience with children under two. Truthfully, I've gotten much better. I let him play in the yard and pick up grass and dirt. I let him eat goldfish and cheerios without helicoptering about him waiting for the choking to ensue. If his nuk falls on the floor, I don't frantically sterilize it anymore. He gets smooched by the dogs without me feeling the need to wash their kisses off. Two weeks ago he stayed in the church nursery without me. I'm learning and growing and chilling out.
But...
I'm still nervous about him being sick. So my little noodle-baby is sleeping right now, and I'm watching him like a hawk and helicopter rolled up into one. I bet Nickel can hear my propeller across the West End.
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Summer Cold: Vile
T.G. took a break from his school report writing to walk the Dogs of Insanity and Little Guy is in for the night so I can steal a few precious seconds online, wheeeee!
Sadly, I haven't got much to write about as I've spent the past few days dealing with a wicked cold that apparently came from outer space or somewhere equally baffling and vast. I don't recall coming into contact with any sick people. I'm pretty careful about using hand sanitizer after going into a store or public place. Colds don't usually strike during the summer. Logically, I should not have one. I'm blaming the Liberals. I have no proof to back this theory up, but then again, they have no proof of global warming. So there.
Speaking of global warming, I wish to get a windmill. Not that I believe in global warming at all, but I do believe in being a good steward of the incredible planet God gave us. I always run into this weird situation with the environmental eco-people regarding planetary care. See, my whole life I've believed in conservation, organic farming, and respecting the flora and fauna around us. However, I don't buy into much of the baloney we get thrown at us daily regarding environmental concerns. I do buy into common sense. Common sense tells me that it would behoove us to take care of our planet because we have to live here. Our children have to live here. People who are not us or our children also have to live here. Therefore I am going to figure out ways to personally use less fossil fuels. I like animals. I like plants. I don't like eating food full of genetically altered dna and antibiotics. You know each thing you buy at a store gets noted by their computer systems and tracked? If you buy more organic products the store will stock more organic products. Amazing, right?
I think I'm rambling, and for that the Liberals do not get blamed, but the Sudafed does...wait...does that mean I'm blaming Big Pharmaceutical? Hm.
Ah well, I'm off to squirt Afrin up my snout. Hooray!
Sadly, I haven't got much to write about as I've spent the past few days dealing with a wicked cold that apparently came from outer space or somewhere equally baffling and vast. I don't recall coming into contact with any sick people. I'm pretty careful about using hand sanitizer after going into a store or public place. Colds don't usually strike during the summer. Logically, I should not have one. I'm blaming the Liberals. I have no proof to back this theory up, but then again, they have no proof of global warming. So there.
Speaking of global warming, I wish to get a windmill. Not that I believe in global warming at all, but I do believe in being a good steward of the incredible planet God gave us. I always run into this weird situation with the environmental eco-people regarding planetary care. See, my whole life I've believed in conservation, organic farming, and respecting the flora and fauna around us. However, I don't buy into much of the baloney we get thrown at us daily regarding environmental concerns. I do buy into common sense. Common sense tells me that it would behoove us to take care of our planet because we have to live here. Our children have to live here. People who are not us or our children also have to live here. Therefore I am going to figure out ways to personally use less fossil fuels. I like animals. I like plants. I don't like eating food full of genetically altered dna and antibiotics. You know each thing you buy at a store gets noted by their computer systems and tracked? If you buy more organic products the store will stock more organic products. Amazing, right?
I think I'm rambling, and for that the Liberals do not get blamed, but the Sudafed does...wait...does that mean I'm blaming Big Pharmaceutical? Hm.
Ah well, I'm off to squirt Afrin up my snout. Hooray!
Saturday, June 5, 2010
Twilight Shortie
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Bree Tanner is OUT!!! YES!!!!
I'm off to Barnes and Noble Lalalala la la la Laaaaaaaaaa!
I'm off to Barnes and Noble Lalalala la la la Laaaaaaaaaa!
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Literary Mourning
I'm currently reading a book about a woman who takes up knitting after she loses her five year old daughter to spinal meningitis. The book is very good. I could tell it was going to be good before I'd even finished the first sentence, but for me, it is also very hard to read.
Something has happened to my psyche ever since having the Little Guy where any mention of the death of a child has the power to open up a chasm of horror inside me. It's a depth of dread and anguish I can't even describe. The love I feel for him eclipses any other emotion I've ever had and the very thought of him no longer existing is terrifying and horrible. And I don't know if this happens to everyone, but when I read a story about a child dying I cannot help but have momentary thought of 'What if it were MY child?'. The other day I was watching a movie based on E.M. Forster's book Where Angels Fear to Tread and realized that a child was going to die. I immediately turned it off, as if by stopping the video, I was able to stop the story and thereby save the child.
T.G. and I lost a baby before I became pregnant with the Little Guy. At the time I thought I understood the feelings that go with having a child, even though I never held that little baby once in my arms. I certainly did love my little unborn baby, but it was the love of a mother for an unmet and unknown potential. I longed for that baby, I prayed for it, I wanted it so very very much, but I know now that I did not love it as I love Little Guy. I couldn't possibly. With Little Guy I bonded with every nursing, I woke several times a night and tenderly cared for him, marveling at his beauty. My days are filled with him. I wake when he does, we eat together, I am the last person he sees before a nap and the first person he sees when he wakes. I, in essence, gave up the person I was before and assumed a new identity as his mother. I put the joy of his being on like a garment until it simply became me. And because of this, I know that if something ever happened to him I would be lost. I'm not me anymore, I'm his mommy. There is a certain terror that goes with loving another human being so much that your identity is completely intertwined with their existence. To be so very vulnerable and to know that I cannot protect him from everything harmful gives me pause several times a day. He is so small. He is so lovely. He is so beloved.
So I read about this mother who has lost her little girl and even though she is a character in a book, I mourn with her. I can understand her emptiness because it is almost too hard to bear imagining that emptiness for myself. And I think even though it is a very good book, I will not read more like it. At least for now, I'd rather not want to imagine what that pain feels like.
Something has happened to my psyche ever since having the Little Guy where any mention of the death of a child has the power to open up a chasm of horror inside me. It's a depth of dread and anguish I can't even describe. The love I feel for him eclipses any other emotion I've ever had and the very thought of him no longer existing is terrifying and horrible. And I don't know if this happens to everyone, but when I read a story about a child dying I cannot help but have momentary thought of 'What if it were MY child?'. The other day I was watching a movie based on E.M. Forster's book Where Angels Fear to Tread and realized that a child was going to die. I immediately turned it off, as if by stopping the video, I was able to stop the story and thereby save the child.
T.G. and I lost a baby before I became pregnant with the Little Guy. At the time I thought I understood the feelings that go with having a child, even though I never held that little baby once in my arms. I certainly did love my little unborn baby, but it was the love of a mother for an unmet and unknown potential. I longed for that baby, I prayed for it, I wanted it so very very much, but I know now that I did not love it as I love Little Guy. I couldn't possibly. With Little Guy I bonded with every nursing, I woke several times a night and tenderly cared for him, marveling at his beauty. My days are filled with him. I wake when he does, we eat together, I am the last person he sees before a nap and the first person he sees when he wakes. I, in essence, gave up the person I was before and assumed a new identity as his mother. I put the joy of his being on like a garment until it simply became me. And because of this, I know that if something ever happened to him I would be lost. I'm not me anymore, I'm his mommy. There is a certain terror that goes with loving another human being so much that your identity is completely intertwined with their existence. To be so very vulnerable and to know that I cannot protect him from everything harmful gives me pause several times a day. He is so small. He is so lovely. He is so beloved.
So I read about this mother who has lost her little girl and even though she is a character in a book, I mourn with her. I can understand her emptiness because it is almost too hard to bear imagining that emptiness for myself. And I think even though it is a very good book, I will not read more like it. At least for now, I'd rather not want to imagine what that pain feels like.
Work Dilemma of Confusion
So, T.G. used to work for a large truck manufacturing company in the Lehigh Valley who shall remain unnamed. Of course, said truck manufacturing company laid him off about two years ago, which was quite inconvenient for us as we relied on the paycheck and healthcare they provided. Happily we were blessed with another job opening up nearly immediately at T.G.'s current employment which is run by one of his childhood friends and is a really awesome place to work. However, at the aforementioned trucking company T.G. was up to top rate and the benefits were free and also very awesome. At his new job the pay is about half of what he was making before and the benefits are not free or quite as good. Not that I'm complaining, I LOVE his current job and the benefits are very good ones, just not as good as the other ones. More importantly, T.G. loves his current job, his boss, his work...everything. There is room for advancement, he does not come home dead tired and disgusted by his co-workers, and he enjoys what he does. Personally, I think that if you find a job you love, you are massively blessed and you stay right there loving it...HOWEVER
Now previous truck company job is opening up again and T.G. will most likely get called back in June and we have BIG decisions to make.
See, if T.G. goes back to the first job we will most likely be able to pay our house off in two years. We'll also have the free benefits again, and will be comfortable financially. It's not that we're uncomfortable now, but our purse is slimmer than it was, and we've had to be more frugal in order to keep our savings intact. On the other hand, if T.G. goes back, he will not be doing a job he loves and the truck manufacturing company is always a bit of gamble with possible lay-offs in the future always looming large over our heads. It is a conundrum. More money means paying off the house and car and the relief that comes with being debt-free. But more money also means a job that T.G. does not love and the uncomfortable feeling of not knowing if it will disappear again.
What I'm hoping will happen, and I think T.G. is really hoping as well is that he can go over everything with his current boss and see if he can do both jobs if he gets called back to the truck place. So that would mean full-time at truckville and a few hours a week at the other job. This would mean T.G. would be working an awful lot though and I'm not sure how I feel about that. I would miss him so much. He already has school two nights a week and those days are so lonely for me. I just don't know what to think. Anyway, I'm praying about all of it, because I know the Lord will direct T.G. and I as to how to handle this situation. He knows where T.G. is meant to work and I'm certain when the time comes He'll make our choice very apparent to us.
Now previous truck company job is opening up again and T.G. will most likely get called back in June and we have BIG decisions to make.
See, if T.G. goes back to the first job we will most likely be able to pay our house off in two years. We'll also have the free benefits again, and will be comfortable financially. It's not that we're uncomfortable now, but our purse is slimmer than it was, and we've had to be more frugal in order to keep our savings intact. On the other hand, if T.G. goes back, he will not be doing a job he loves and the truck manufacturing company is always a bit of gamble with possible lay-offs in the future always looming large over our heads. It is a conundrum. More money means paying off the house and car and the relief that comes with being debt-free. But more money also means a job that T.G. does not love and the uncomfortable feeling of not knowing if it will disappear again.
What I'm hoping will happen, and I think T.G. is really hoping as well is that he can go over everything with his current boss and see if he can do both jobs if he gets called back to the truck place. So that would mean full-time at truckville and a few hours a week at the other job. This would mean T.G. would be working an awful lot though and I'm not sure how I feel about that. I would miss him so much. He already has school two nights a week and those days are so lonely for me. I just don't know what to think. Anyway, I'm praying about all of it, because I know the Lord will direct T.G. and I as to how to handle this situation. He knows where T.G. is meant to work and I'm certain when the time comes He'll make our choice very apparent to us.
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